I just have to say this:Oh My Gawd...how fluff'n cool is that shit, that you get to be put up in some royal hut (which you know had to be all kinds of extra fancy) and eat your weight in donuts (or whatever the fluffy Ugandan equivalent of donuts is)...My mouth is salivating just thinking about all the sexy cabana boys that the skinny bitch discriminator King is probably sending my way ,because he thinks they're ugly and no sexual attraction will occur, to hand feed me cupcakes......Excuse me I need a moment.
Anyways...I bring up Uganda and King Fluff Stalker, because I'm on day two of being a good girl and eating all sorts of healthy shit and it's depressing. I'm not sure who said eating clean makes you feel good...but take it from this
Your body feels horrid, because FACT #1: digesting a cupcake is easier than trying to digest fiber..that shit just goes right through you..seriously I need you to be as grossed out as I am. And right now, day dreaming about a society in which I am a Queen in Waiting being hand fed butter is the only thing keeping me from trying to stab myself with a carrot.
Yes, today's post is bitter...but that's how it is when your body is detoxing
Because I barely have the energy to wave today (Fact #2: carrots do not give you as much energy as a sugar rush), I'm putting up the Peace sign ( trying hard not to flip you off) and Saying "Feed Me",