It's All My Mother's Fault...And I Can Prove It! Plus 30 Day Hooker Challenge

Some of you may remember my not too long ago post entitled Memoirs of a Fat Little Girl where I teetered back and forth between blaming my Mama for my fluffiness and not. Well, anyways, shortly after writing that post I joined a webinar hosted by Cynthia Pasquella, a celebrity nutritionist who knows her stuff,  and ...wait for it....can help me prove it's My MOM's FAULT I'm extra fluffy.(btw, I know she knows her stuff because I researched her myself..my proof lies in her hotness, I'm deep I know..but no way would I listen to a fluffy nutritionist, I'm judgemental like that).

The webinar was about losing weight according to your genetic type through the proper diet and exercises that are matched to your genetic profile. Apparently, the way you lose and gain weight can be scientifically linked to your genetic make-up, I mean even the foods that you crave can be genetically linked. This means two things.

 1) Validation because genetically speaking, as my mother is the other fluffy one in this household and I take after her eating habits: IT'S ALL HER FAULT ( please imagine me jumping up and down waving a piece of paper like the Baby Mommas do on Maury going " I told you...I told you son" quickly followed by a "Please don't slap me" as I run away into a safe hiding spot protecting my head from any oncoming object being thrown at me). Being able to frame the part that says I am genetically inclined to being obese will bring me inner peace.

And
2) I have been banging my head against the wall the last couple of days as to why I am not a super hawt skinny tramp by now. And ,it could just really be that I'm following the wrong diet or, GASP , doing too much exercise.( Let's leave out the fact I haven't been a good skinny tramp, but rather a loyal donut eating fluffster sitting on the couch, I'm not sure this has had any affect on my lack of fluff loss.)

This genetic test ,and you can see a sample result here, tells you what diet is best  for you, what exercises in what quantity are best for you,and better food alternatives based on your genetic make-up...basically that bitch can read your body's split personality mind and put it on paper. All you need after this test is the skanky commitment to follow through on something that will help you lose the weight and keep it off.

For someone who has been dealing with fluff issues all her life, this not a saving grace, rather a tangible tool that I can believe in and really follow through on. It is one thing for my doctor to say go out and exercise and eat healthier just like skinny mini over there, and another for him to tell me based on your genetics, you need to do XY and Z to achieve optimal results. In other words it a wonderful alternative to going through 500 aggravating diets before you find the right one for you.

To say the least I can't wait to save all the required pesos and take the test. If you are interested on obtaining more professional information about the test ( I realize I am more stuck on doing my Maury Povich act than informing you), or taking the test go HERE. I signed up as in affiliate and get a little kick back if you use that link ( this is all going to the Prove my Momma Wrong fund... she is currently denying it is all her fault and I think she is trying to blame... ME! Can you believe that crap?).

Also, before I leave you today, I wanted to let you all know that today I am embarking on  Ana Caban's 30 in 30 Challenge. This is  where Ana , your favorite fluffster (and several other people that don't matter to me unless they are you) try a different exercise/ or the same exercise every day for 30 days. The goal is to get fit with Ana.

Please let me know if you want to join in by leaving a comment below, we can start some sort of group and log our progress..I'm thinking of calling us: Ana's 30 day Hookers. Today's Fluff-i-cise is "jogging" 1/2 mile in hooker heels...may the ankle gods be with you!


Picture was taken from the Shot Couture Street Fashion Blog